Do’s and don’ts of relocating with your child

Relocating with your child after a divorce can be a daunting and emotionally charged decision. Whether you’re seeking a fresh start abroad or within the UK, it’s essential to understand the legal complexities and ensure you’re acting in your child’s best interests.

Part 2 of our guide explores the do’s and don’ts of child relocation, highlighting the importance of proper preparation and the potential risks of moving without the other parent’s consent, which can have serious legal consequences, including child abduction charges. With careful planning, you can navigate this process while safeguarding your child’s wellbeing and maintaining their relationship with both parents.

1. Don’t abduct your child!

A lot of parents are tempted to take the law into their own hands.  Knowing that the other parent would never consent to the relocation, they simply take the child to the desired new location on holiday and fail to return.

This is child abduction and is, amongst other things, a criminal offence in the UK.  It is also widely considered to be one of the worst forms of child abuse that a parent can inflict on a child.  Research is still ongoing, but recent studies have shown that the trauma experienced by an abducted child is equal to or in some cases worse than experiencing the death of a parent.

Child victims are mostly between two and eleven years old; about 75% are six years old or younger. Two-thirds of the cases involve one child. The most common times for the abduction, detention, or concealment are January and August-thus coinciding with children’s vacations and holidays (Finkelhor, et. al, 1990).

And this is quite apart from the suffering and worry that you will be inflicting on the left behind parent.

2. Think very carefully before launching an application

Firstly, litigation is inherently risky and there are many aspects of it that you cannot control.  You can’t control the judge on the day.  You can’t control the way in which your ex will give evidence (he/she might be utterly sincere and believable, or he/she may be terrible). You can’t control whether the social worker will take to you and how he or she will give their evidence. You can’t really control how long it will go on for or how much it will cost.  You can’t control or predict how it will impact on your own mental health and wellbeing.

Secondly, the process of litigation itself is not good for children and so you would want to be sure you have a very good chance of winning.  Otherwise, if you are considering relocating with your child and you have been unable to agree with your ex (including trying mediation), then and only then should you consider applying to the court.

3. Time it right

All children are remarkably resilient, but as a general rule, younger children tend to adapt much more easily and quickly to a big move and a major change than older ones. Think carefully about their schooling.  Some junctures will be a much better time to move than others.  Don’t do it in the middle of important exams, and don’t move in the middle of the school year if you can help it.

4. If you are going for it: preparation, preparation, preparation!

The key to a successful relocation application (whether internal or external) is in the meticulous preparation and presentation of your case. Child relocation cases are often finely balanced and will produce a binary outcome. The stakes are incredibly high and it will feel like a ‘win’/’lose’ scenario; there will be no middle-ground.

It is critical that your plans for your child’s relocation are clearly  and comprehensively set out in your written evidence (usually in the form of witness statements). The more precise you can be about details of your child’s relocation, the stronger your application will be. A court will be impressed by a well-thought out, detailed and precise application.

You should consider the following in your application and written evidence:

• Housing in your new location. Exhibit maps, photos and house brochures.
• Existing ties/connections in your new location i.e. proximity to your friends and family.
• The quality and accessibility of healthcare
• Your employment prospects and financial considerations
• The quality of the education for your child and the ease of him/her transitioning into the new education system. Exhibit a school brochure and ideally a letter offering your child a place.
• Transport connections between your intended new place and your ex’s current location. Exhibit transport schedules, details of flights/buses/trains to and from your ex’s location and your new location
• Your child’s wishes and feelings; If your child supports the move, you should mention this, but take very great care not to lead the witness.
• Can your ex easily relocate? If so, say so, and how they could.
• How will a refusal of permission impact you and your life going forward? Explain what impact staying put will have on you.

For international relocations, you should also consider and deal with:

• Language issues
• Visas/immigration issues
• The political situation/ crime levels/ security in the new country
• Mirror orders – is the new country a signatory to the Hague Convention 1996, a member of the EU/signatory to Brussels II revised?

Your written evidence should be carefully drafted and comprehensively detailed.

Summary

Child relocations can be fraught with complexity. The court’s primary consideration is the welfare of the child, but it has to balance multiple factors before it can reach a decision.

If you are considering a move with your child, you should be mindful of the impact it will have on your child (good and bad) but also that of your ex. If a court application is inevitable, then a precisely detailed, child-focused and clear logistical proposal for the relocation is fundamental for a successful application.

We at Expatriate Law have extensive experience in advising clients in child relocation matters, and we can help you in your preparation and presentation of your case, whether it be in making an application for your child’s relocation or resisting an application for a move.

Please email either Eliza or David on eliza@expatriatelaw.com and David.hansford@expatriatelaw.com or call us on  +44 (0) 20 3096 7169 to discuss your matter in strict confidence.